"First, a recap. The North Korean military has been evacuating thousands of civilians from their homes on the island nation of...*static*...sea. Why? Kim Jong-chul, dynastic ruler of North Korea, claims it is a humanitarian mission. Tremors have been felt as far away as Hawaii. North Korea claims a volcanic eruption threatens the island's population. US scientists say there has been no volcanic activity on the islands in recorded history! Secretary of State Douglas Bornheim says North Korea's actions are nothing short of an invasion. So what is the real story? Dr. Joseph Harford, chair of the commission of Far East relations is with us tonight. First Joe, what exactly is Kim Jong-chul planning?"
"Well Alex, there's no doubt this has been building up for some time. Kim Jong-chul has been looking to extend North Korean influence in the Pacific, and they have focused on a group of de facto, independent nations, which they perceive as susceptible to North Korean influence. As you will remember, these islands were in the news four years ago, when the North Koreans supported the Marxist RFIP independence movement. Tensions skyrocketed when the post-revolutionary government, backed by Kim Jong-chul, set about nationalizing billions of dollars of American corporate assets."
"And what kind of threat do the North Koreans pose?"
"North Korea is no longer the poor man of Asia, Alex. 2008 represented a sea change in North Korean aspirations. On succeeding his father, Kim Jong-chul immediately initiated Xiaoping style economic reforms, turning North Korean metropolises into virtually independent ultra-free market city states. Pyongyang now has the second-highest techno-dollar turnover on the planet. This has allowed the North Korean regime to buy in the latest Chinese military technology - and let's not forget, North Korean words are backed by nuclear weapons."
"The diplomatic crisis surrounding the Ling Shan islands continues to escalate amid threats from the US to take action against North Korea, following the forced evacuation of Ling Shan's civilian population. Despite recent seismic disturbances in the area, foreign observers conclude that the evacuation is unjustified, raising concerns that the North Korean are using the situation to forward their own political goals in the region."
"US officials have urged crisis talks with Pyongyang over their apparent refusal to release five US nationals, whom they believe are being held against their will. A North Korean spokesman refuted the claim, stating that Dr. David Rosenthal and his research team are working together with the North Korean government to monitor seismic activity in the area."
"First, the headlines in detail, BBS World News. I'm Andrew Jones. The US Congress has passed a joint resolution to authorize the use of United States Armed Forces against the People's Republic of Korea. Protests greeted the announcement in London, Beijing, New York, Berlin, and many other cities around the world. Protest organizers claimed a Million Man March; the White House has so far refused to comment. American organizers continue to gather just outside the Ling Shan islands' exclusion zone. The National Security Council announced yesterday that 35 thousand military personnel will flow into the area over the coming days."
"In related news, banana crisis. As a leading world supplier of bananas, recent events on the Ling Shan islands has threatened a banana drought. Prices of global banana stocks already riding high following the evacuation of the island rose dramatically on the news of the planned US action. World banana importers expressed concern over the potential destruction of existing banana stocks. Many thousands of tons of bananas lie awaiting export in Ling Shan's main harbor, but the US Navy is enforcing a strict blockade."
"BBS World News. I'm Andrew Jones. General Ri Chan Kyong of the Korean People's Army was killed today by US forces on the Ling Shan islands. A spokesman for the People's Republic of Korea claimed it was a political assassination in breach of Article 1-47 of the Fourth Geneva Convention. General Kyong was a member of the PRK Supreme People's Assembly. A White House spokesman called such claims 'outrageous hypocrisy' and cited multiple breaches of Article 1-47 by the KPA forces under General Kyong's control, including taking civilian hostages and illegal deportations."
"BBS World News. I'm Andrew Jones. Weather satellites above the Pacific Ocean have taken images described as 'earth shattering' by a prominent member of the world scientific community. Dr. Adam Silver of the World Meteorological Society said it could potentially be a completely new phenomenon. Describing the images, Dr. Silver said they revealed a perfectly circular - possibly spherical - atmospheric event that is completely obscuring the terrain below. The event covers an area the size of Manhattan, and Dr. Silver thinks it might be increasing in size. Commenting on reports, Adrmiral Morrison acknowledged the satellite images were 'accurate', but played down their significance. He maintained that the Korean People's Army was close to surrender and that the Ling Shan islands would soon be under American control."
"BBS World News. I'm Andrew Jones. At a press briefing on the USS Constitution earlier today, Admiral Morrison reported 'stunning successes' against KPA forces on the Ling Shan islands. A spokesman for the government in Pyongyang accepted that there had been some early losses, but reiterated their position that US Military action is illegal under international law. The spokesman also accused the US government of putting civilian lives at risk with its antagonistic and aggressive behavior. Admiral Morrison, when questioned on the Pyongyang government's response, reported that US forces would soon return the islands to their rightful owners."